Pat’s Story

Pat has been caring for her husband Trevor for most of their lives together—53 years supporting his type 1 diabetes, and the last 12 years helping him manage spinal and other physical health issues. A retired teacher, Pat has been with Trevor for 60 years. She loves walking, gardening, visiting stately homes, and wellbeing activities like sound baths and singing. She used to enjoy many of these with Trevor. Read Pat’s story to see how Carers in Hertfordshire has helped her.

“I get up at 6.30am to wake Trevor ready for the Care Worker, who showers and dresses him.  Trevor wears a sensor for his diabetes, which alerts him as to when his blood sugar is high or low.  He no longer has awareness without this sensor. I need to change the sensor every 10 days and ensure he is taking appropriate action if the alarm goes off. His legs and feet need particular attention every day, so that he doesn’t develop diabetic ulcers. I also plan and prepare meals in accordance with his diabetic needs. 

Trevor has had bladder cancer recently, which is in remission, but he still has regular check-ups. As he can’t use public transport, I drive him to his medical, dentist and opticians appointments.  For each journey, his rollator has to be put in the car and taken out again.  We do use the volunteer driving service for appointments at the hospital in London. 

I  also help him get to bed at night and set out all his clothes and surgical stockings ready for the Care Worker in the morning.

I found out about Carers in Hertfordshire through a leaflet I kept seeing at the hospital. For a long time, I didn’t think of myself as a carer, just a wife doing what needed to be done. But as Trevor’s health declined, I picked the leaflet up and reached out for support, because I felt more overwhelmed by my caring role.

Through Carers in Hertfordshire, I was matched with a brilliant Mentor, who helped me to ensure I knew about services available to me. She made me aware of the importance of me looking after my own wellbeing. She led me through some very difficult times last year when Trevor had major surgery and was in hospital and rehab for four months. 

I attend one of your Hub groups for carers, which has been invaluable.  The speakers have provided useful information and guidance. It has been so good to socialise with other carers, who sing from the same hymn sheet. 

I have a Carers’ Passport, which I have used for meals out and the hospital café. 

I just wish I had contacted Carers in Hertfordshire sooner as they have been so supportive and informative.

Pat’s heartfelt advice to other carers is simple but powerful: “Recognise you’re a carer sooner and take care of yourself. You are no good to the person you are caring for if you have made yourself ill.”