Deborah’s Story

Deborah, from Welwyn Garden City, supports her elderly mum as a distance carer. She helps her mum maintain her independence following the loss of her dad. Here she shares more about her caring role and how Carers in Hertfordshire has helped her.

“My mum lives quite far away from me, but I visit as often as I can, helping with daily tasks and taking her to appointments. Even when I’m not there, she calls me regularly, particularly when she needs support or wants someone to talk to.

I didn’t initially realise that I was a carer until an Independent Living Officer pointed it out to me, which led me to register with Carers in Hertfordshire. Through attending the hub meetings, I’ve realised that although we all have different caring situations, we share many of the same experiences. While caring can sometimes feel lonely, the hubs help reduce that sense of isolation.

One of the most important things I’ve learned through caring is patience. I try to offer advice where I can, although it can sometimes be difficult for my mum to accept help. Because of this, I’ve also learned the importance of being considerate and reading between the lines.

It’s an honour and a privilege to support my mum, as it gives me the opportunity to give something back.

My advice to other carers would be to recognise when you need support yourself and don’t be afraid to ask for help.”